2020 Marriage Challenge Day 3

Day 3 of the 28-Day Marriage Challenge

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Day 3: Love Leads

Fear is a bad driver. It's okay to allow him to be a passenger in the car, but he should never be handed the keys.In too many marriages, fear is in charge. Maybe because of past hurts or betrayal. Maybe because of a rough upbringing. Maybe because your just more cautious. We often make decisions based on fear. We don't want to be hurt or vulnerable or rejected, so out of fear of those things we choose to stay quiet or snap back or avoid a tough conversation. Fear leads us and it never leads us to good places. Many fights, tensions, hurt feelings, and confusion in marriage are caused by fear. While it is okay to feel fear, it is not okay to be led by it. We must be led by love.We have to make a conscious choice to identify our fears, put them in the passenger seat, and then intentionally choose the way of love. It will drive us to the tough conversations, toward vulnerability, to take responsibility and apologize, and toward many other productive actions. Fear always looks out for self even at the expense of our spouse. Love always does what is in the best interest of others no matter what we feel. Fear is normal. Feeling it is natural. But don't be led by it.Love leads.  Application: Ask your spouse, "What are some ways you can see I'm being led by fear rather than love?" Don't debate what they say. Listen and consider. Then ask, "What are some ways WE are not being driven by love?" Pick one specific action you can take this week based on love. For more, see:When You Love Someone Too MuchDon't Please People, Love Them