The Conflict Pattern Sabotaging Your Marriage

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Hey there,

Ever find yourself fighting with your spouse and thinking, “Wait, how did we even get here again?”

You’re not alone.

In the latest episode of Change the Odds, I break down the three universal fights every couple has—based on Dr. Sue Johnson’s groundbreaking research—and show how we unintentionally trap ourselves in a cycle of protest and defense. Sound familiar?

💥 Learn the signs of the "Infinity Loop"—the exhausting dance that keeps couples spinning in the same argument.
🧠 Discover why conflict isn’t the problem—your reaction is.
💡 And hear real-life stories of how couples are learning to break the cycle by surfacing their emotions, not just their frustrations.

Whether your fight sounds like “You never help around the house” or “Why don’t you care anymore?”—this episode will help you see what’s really going on underneath the table.

👉 Click here to listen now and find out how to stop fighting each other and start fighting for each other.

You might just save your next argument.

The podcast has about an 8-minute illustration that I believe will help every couple. The faster you recognize this pattern in your marriage, the better off you will be. I’ve started the following video right as the illustration begins. Watch it. Send it to your spouse. And see if you can see the role you play in your conflict.

Mother’s Day is just a few weeks away. Remember, it was sheer coincidence that Stay In Your Lane launched on Mother’s Day two years ago. But it’s done very well when wedded to his hallmark holiday. The fact is, it’s hard for all of us to control what we control while choosing NOT to control what belongs to others. If you have found the book useful, send a copy or two to a friend. Don’t say, “I think you need this.” Think it, but don’t say it. Instead, say, “This helped me, and I thought it might be helpful to you.”